Having to work is lame.

My job can be excessively lame at times. My daily toil as a lowly barwench will no doubt be recounted in detail many, many, many times in future posts. But for now... here's a quick run down.

Where : The Rosemount Hotel. A big, old, stinky live music venue that has a lot of history, lots of broken stuff and a lot of good memories.

How long: I am currently in my 24th month of employment. That's two years of pouring pints, cutting lemons, asking some knob how they want their steak cooked and yelling at people for smoking at the bar.

Dear God, Why?: I secretly love the place but constantly bitch about it, this is a given for any hospitality worker. Contrary to some regular customers beliefs, I do not live there and do not intend on working there for the rest of my life. I am also a uni student and have something that resembles a social life, and both of these need to be funded somehow.

Pros: There are many positives to working at The Rosie and I wouldn't still be there if there wasn't. Here's a few

• I have met some of the greatest humans (and occasional dog) working there, both staff and patrons, and at times they are the only things keeping me sane. I even gained a frickin sweet boyfriend out of the whole two months he worked there. He quickly moved on to a much better paying job after asking me out, and he can cook, so I feel the universe liked me that day.
  
• I have consumed copious amounts of alcohol, mostly free, but otherwise always cheap and there is always a familar face behind the bar to drive me home afterwards.
  
• I calculated(very poorly and quickly) that over the past two years I have probably made in excess of $3000 worth of tips, that's free money suckas!! When I say free, I mean often I had to let disgusting excuses for men believe that I actually wanted to smile at them in return for them telling me to 'keep the change' with a wink after they hand me a $10 note for a $9.80 pint. Cheers dickhead.
  
• The free shows, I have seen some awesome bands at that place and all from the best viewpoint behind the bar, it's smack bang in the middle of the room, no drunken dude mashing his dreadies into my face, plenty of room to dance and there's always room to put my Twisties and coke without either getting spilt. Heaven. But that's still not the best bit, earlier in the day I'm always there to hear the band sound check, I get my own private show as I set the bar up for the night and normally get to have a chat with the act, this normally involves something along the lines of...

SuperAwesomeRockDude : Can I get a pint of water?
Me: Sure
SuperAwesomeRockDude: Thanks

Sweet huh? So yes there are many awesome things about my job including the fact that I simply just don't work in retail. But then there are......


Cons, so many cons....:

• The hours. I work weekends, Friday and Saturday nights. This is lame. But it does stop me from spending too much money on going out and lining up in an alleyway to get into Amplifier only to get whipped in the face by some scrags ratty hair extensions. If I want a night off I can just ask, but I have missed out on some friends great parties and nights out.
• The cleaning. Bar work can be fun during the shift, but cleaning up after people is not
• The customers. Some people are nice, some are just complete wankers. I have proof of this every shift.
  
• Drunkeness. Often this is funny and highly amusing to me, it can also be profitable in the tips department. Too often this is insulting, dangerous, rude, threatening, depressing and just plain annoying.
• Authority figures. Sometimes I wonder how people got into these powerful positions in the first place. How do people so highly incompetent, so dumb and so lacking in common sense manage to score important jobs with a certain level of responsibilty? It just baffles me and I battle with it every week.
• The repetitiveness. Sometimes when I want to depress myself just for fun, I like to think about how many times I have opened the till at work, or how many times I have said "Hi, what can I get you?", or how many times I have wanted to reach over the bar and bitch slap some guy who asks "What beer have you got?" YOU RETARD THERE IS A MASSIVE SIGN LISTING THEM AND THEY ARE ALL MARKED CLEARLY ON THE TAPS, I AM NOT GOING TO LIST EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM BECAUSE YOU CAN'T BE BOTHERED ENGAGING THE MUSCLES THAT OPEN YOUR FUCKING EYES!!!!
• This one is mostly a con, but can also be pro sometimes on a slow day. - Crazy people. The Rosie is far too close to a methadone clinic, an old peoples home, HomesWest housing and some other place where all the weirdos go for my liking. There are strange people wandering around North Perth and for some reason they feel The Rosemount is some sort of refuge and the like to congregate there and talk to me even though I am clearly sending out 'stay the hell away from me' vibes. When will they learn?

So even though the Cons seem to exceed the Pros, I still work there, and probably will until I finish my degree in another year. Right now its good material for this blog and I shouldn't whinge because some people can't even get a job and I should be grateful.

Im still going to whinge.

Rant over.

Trying to start a blog is lame.

You know what's lame? Being lame is lame. I decided to start this blog as avenue to spew my hatred for certain people\places\objects etc, in a healthy and hopefully humorous way. But already I have been thwarted!
Here's a list of the following people who made it into my first post because they are so lame they took my first choices of a URL for my blog.

www.lame.blogspot.com
This guy thinks he can take the top spot of lameness with comics! I got frustrated and bored about four sentences in, but from what I can gather this guy sits around writing comics based around the periodic table on another site, and then blogs about his exciting adventures on this site. He then begs people to find it funny, all the while making complex references to World of Warcraft and other hobbies enjoyed by virgins.

www.lamelamelame.blogspot.com
This one just kind of hurt my eyes. First of all IT'S ALL WRITTEN IN CAPITALS AND THAT JUST REMINDS ME OF MY MUM. She's still new to the whole SMS text messaging thing and can't figure out how to get out of caps so I feel like she's constantly yelling when she asks IF IM COMING TO DINNER TONIGHT AND IF SO COULD I BRING SOME BUTTER BECAUSE SHE FORGOT TO PICK SOME UP!!!!!!!! LOVE MUM!!!! ARRGGHHHHH!!!!

So there's immediate points lost, but it's not just the capitals. I just have no idea what the blog is even about, I gather the author has some interest in sports because there's a fully awesome photo of a soccer ball with lightning shooting through it and then there is an indepth discussion of the difference between two shirts worn by some sportsmen......

and I quote.... in its entirety...

" see>>? muahahahahahah. =.='' that one, red colour shirt one.. seeeeeeeeee?? tell u wud.. he sux =]]]]] andandandand that blue shirt one? cool... muahahahahahahah...

h0h0h0h0h.. and that liverpool thingy sux too.. =]]]]]] "


But that's about it really. So again, another waste of a good URL that I could have used..

(I will give him some extra credit because his smiley faces have in excess of four double chins and that made me laugh. Also, in parts, he has turned his back on the traditional "haha's" and explored the benefits of using "hohoho's" which makes me feel jolly.)


www.superlame.blogspot.com
This one just shits me because there is NOTHING! Just a big, blank expanse of whiteness, someone took the name and did nothing with it. Such a waste...




So this is where I ended up, www.lameylamelame.blogspot.com

Obviously I chose this because all the others were taken, but I also find that if you sing the words 'lamey lame lame' and shake your head from side to side like those bobble headed dogs that sit on your dashboard, then it makes it less harsh and promotes good times for all.






You tried it didn't you?




Rant over.