Communicating is lame.

Words are my enemy.

Actually wait, words aren't my enemy, people are my enemy. People and the way they use words are my enemy.

Words are actually quite useful and my possible career is centred around them and the way I use them so I should probably be nice to words.

So let's just stick with me hating the people who use them. It's always the people's fault.

Lately I find myself cringing at a few terms that are being thrown around a little too freely for my liking...


"Thanking you!" - My job involves lots of times a day where I am giving someone something, because of this there is a direct impact on how many times I am thanked. A simple 'cheers' or 'ta' or just a plain old 'thanks' is more than sufficient but some people insist on murdering this age old exchange. Why do these people feel the need to tell me that they are thanking me while they thank me? If you just said 'thank you' in the first place I'm well aware of what you are doing, there is no need for you to tell me " I am thanking you"! It's not like I look at you and say "Serving you!" when I hand you your beer do I? There is no need for either of us to provide a running commentary of our actions while we do them.
It's normally coming from a middle aged man and he always does it with a dorky smile on his face and it's hard to hate him for it. I still manage.

While I'm tearing apart gracious people - I also hate it when some say "Thankyou kindly". Aren't you already being kind when you thank me? Or were all those other thankyous just hollow? Or are you just trying to make yourself sound better by asserting that you are kinder than other thankers? What's your story! Huh!? If you must exaggerate your appreciation, just say 'thankyou very much'.


"Deets" - short and slang for 'details'. As in - "I'll send you some deets on tomorrow night" or "What are the deets for this project?"
What was wrong with the word details? It was only a mere two syllables? I think I hate it most because it's always being used by extremely white guys who just can't fit it into a sentence casually enough for me to not notice it. It just screams "I'M TRYING TO SOUND CHILLAXED"


"Chillaxed" - bleeeeugh.


"Flick you an email" - I have no idea why this one annoys me so much but I just hate how unnecessary it is. Why can't you just send the email like everyone else? There is no flicking involved at any stage of email sending. Thinking, writing, reading, typing, attaching, drafting, proofreading, cutting, copying, pasting and linking are all perfectly acceptable present participles (Yeah - take that every english teacher I've ever had!) that could be used in the process of emailing, but 'flicking' never arises! At a stretch the only time could be when you press the send button, you could possible move your cursor over 'SEND', hold the mouse still with one hand, and then flick the mouse button with the other one - but I just tried it and it really hurt.



"Naysayers" - Who exactly are these naysayers, where can I find someone who refuses something by saying 'nay'. THEY DON'T EXIST SO STOP USING THAT TERM!


"Hubby" - if you ever use this abbreviation in any way, shape or form. I am TOTALLY unfriending you on Facebook.



Sometimes people create and change words for good, like "Maccas", "Octomom" and "Oprah rich". But the other people who abuse them and coin terms like "Brangelina" should chillax before saying thanking you or I will flick them and their hubby an email saying NAY!